June 26, 2009

Woody Allen's Top 10 Funny Quotes


By Joanne Aika Castillo

If there's one comedian I'd turn to for a sure fire dose of laughter, it would be Woody Allen. It seems like everybody knows who Woody Allen is. He is the man behind Annie Hall, Manhattan, Hannah and her Sisters, and a lot more movies which subscribe to the same film genre. Most of his films deal with recurring themes on sexuality, philosophy, literature, psychoanalysis, New York City, and Jewish identity. Aside from that, his films often portray a self-reflexive Woody Allen persona: the neurotic writer in New York City.

Allen's sense of humor can be described as wry, sarcastic, intellectual, neurotic, and self deprecating. He is brand of funny is unmistakably full of wit. I am a total fan of his humor. Almost all the funny quotable quotes that we derive from him and his characters embody an observant humorist who has got something to say about society. What makes it funny is that his dialogues tell us the undeniable truth. He has successfully mastered the humor that doesn't underestimate his audience's intellect.

Having said that, I have compiled ten of Woody Allen's funny quotations. These funny quotes were either taken from one of Woody's interviews or from a funny quotable line uttered by one of his characters. Ive selected funny quotes on sexuality, marriage, literature, death, relationships and pop culture. Surely these funny quotes will not only make you laugh but ponder on other themes as well.

Top 10 Funny Quotes from Woody Allen:

1. I took the speed reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. Its about Russia.

2. If my films dont show a profit, I know Im doing something right.

3. I sold the memoirs of my sex life to a publisher. They are going to make a board game out of it.

4. In Los Angeles they don't throw out their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

5. Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will not have declared you legally insane in order to gain control of your estate.

6. A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me and she said no.

7. I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

8. I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got a 100.

9. The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers.

10. When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

In my opinion, the first three quotes on the list are the funniest. All three quotes exemplify Woody Allen's classic brand of humor: the wry, sarcastic, and self-deprecating qualities of his jokes. The first one on speed reading is a hilarious critique on pretentiousness. The second funny quote is an ironic and defensive view of a film's value and commercial success. The third funny quote juxtaposes Allen's sex life and a board game which makes it a clever example of his self-deprecating humor. All in all, each of Woody Allen's funny quotes is a testament that humor is indeed a universal language.

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